Peterborough United defender Gaby Zakuani, Peterborough United superfan Adi Mowles and Michael from Sealskinz Waterproof Socks rate the Football Songs vying to be number one for the World Cup. Spinning the disks is Paul Stainton. Broadcast at 08:50 on Friday 11th June 2010 in the Peterborough Breakfast Show on BBC Radio Cambridgeshire.
PAUL: So who is going to be number one over the World Cup? There are so many songs out there, so many to choose from. From this, which is the new version of the Baddiel and Skinner song (MUSIC). Yes, Robbie Williams and Russell Brand involved in that mess. And of course james Corden and Dizzy Rascal have given us this. (MUSIC). It’s awful. Oh dear. Yes. We’re going to review all the potential World Cup number one songs. We were going to review them with Gaby Zakuani from Peterborough United but he’s having a little lay-in this morning. We’ve been trying to ring him, and hopefully we’ll get through to him before the end of the show. We thought it might be interesting as well to have a sort of America versus England review. So Michael Shuster good morning.
MICHAEL: Hey good morning.
PAUL: An American in England.
MICHAEL: Yes for a long time now.
PAUL: Yes, who invented the waterproof sock. How’s that going for you?
MICHAEL: It’s going rather well. Warm and dry.
MICHAEL: Any time of the year.
PAUL: And of course, when we were thinking about a stock Englishman, somebody who epitomised the British bulldog, and looked like one, we got Adi Mowles.
ADI: (CHUCKLES) That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said about me.
PAUL: Peterborough United superfan. Good morning.
ADI: Good morning.
PAUL: Now obviously your musical pedigree, Adi, Michael, do you have any interests Adi in music at all?
ADI: In music?
ADI: I’m a massive Gilbert O’Sullivan fan.
ADI: Yes I love my music. I love poetry like Billy Bragg.
ADI: Geniuses like that. Lily Allen has a go but she’s not really in the Bragg, O’Sullivan bracket.
ADI: Anything that’s after about nineteen seventy nine I’m afraid I turn off.
PAUL: Ok. Michael?
MICHAEL: Sorry I’m showing my age but I’m good oldtime rock and roll, Bruce Springsteen that sort of thing. Everything else to me is just noise. Like I say maybe I’m just showing my age.
PAUL: Ok well if you can just give us a couple of words on each of the contenders for the World Cup number one gentlemen. Let’s start with the outsider first of all. This is this. (MUSIC-Nessun Dorma) Twenty five to one. The Three Tenors have done a version of Nessun Dorma, twentieth anniversary edition. Adi Mowles for England please.
ADI: Rubbish. It’s Italian.
PAUL: Michael Shuster for the US of A.
MICHAEL: That’s not the best you have, is it?
PAUL: (LAUGHS) All right. At twenty to one, it’s the genius of Terry Venables. (MUSIC-If I Can Dream). Adi Mowles for England. Sir Terry Venables.
ADI: He actually sounds like Winnie the Pooh.
PAUL: He does a bit actually. What do you reckon? Chances of getting to number one Adi?
ADI: Unfortunately in this pathetic country at the moment it probably will get to number one. But anybody who relies on tan out of a bottle should not be allowed on Top of the Pops.
PAUL: (COLLAPSES) Michael Shuster for the US of A. What do you think?
MICHAEL: I’d love to have them play that in the dressing room before they march on out, just to give them the inspiration they deserve.
PAUL: (HELPLESS) I think it would be brilliant. I think they should. All right, that’s Terry Venables then. The Lightning Seeds with Baddiel and Skinner, Three Lions, is twelve to one, the original. The FIFA World Cup song K ‘naan Waving the Flag is at twelve to one as well. (MUSIC TURNED UP-If I Can Dream). I love the ending to that. At eight to one it’s John Barnes and New Order. (MUSIC-World in Motion). Classic, classic, probably best England song ever. Adi Mowles?
ADI: Very good at its time, but shouldn’t be re-released because his dubbing, his miming has got even worse.
PAUL: Like his dribbling. Or his running. Michael Shuster, fancy that for the World Cup number one?
MICHAEL: I just think it’s sad that you have to look at this song as something you think is actually going to win.
PAUL: Thank you. This is the second favourite. I played you a bit of it earlier. It’s The Squad featuring Robbie Williams and Russell Brand. Their version of Three Lions. (MUSIC-Three Lions). Is it an improvement Adi Mowles for England?
ADI: No it absolutely isn’t. One bloke who everybody thought was gay but isn’t, and one bloke who thinks he isn’t gay and is. Horrible.
PAUL: (WHEEZE) Michael Shuster. What do you think? An improvement?
MICHAEL: (WEARY SIGH) No.
PAUL: I can see you’re exasperated by all this. Let’s cut to the chase then. Let’s cut to the favourite, which is, I played you a little sneak preview earlier, the favourite is Dizzy Rascal and james Corden, Shout for England. Two to seven on this is. (MUSIC-Shout for England). It’s a reworking of course of the Tears for Fears classic. I absolutely hate it, but Adi Mowles for England.
ADI: It’s the least worst of all of them, but it’s nothing on Back Home from the 1970, which I think, was about four years before America was founded.
PAUL: That probably is. And Michael? What do you think? Number one for the World Cup?
MICHAEL: I think like many things to do with this tournament, if that’s the best you have, then fine, take it.
PAUL: Ok. We’ve got Gaby Zakuani! Breaking news. Gaby Zakuani! (TO PRODUCER) Are you sure? Is he here? Morning Gaby.
GABY: Good morning. Morning.
PAUL: How are you?
GABY: Yeah I’m fine mate, I’m fine.
PAUL: Having a little lay-in this morning were you?
GABY: Ha ha ha. I was just in the bathroom getting myself ready for the Big Show.
PAUL: Well it is the Big Show. You know it. So Gaby, big friends with Dizzy Rascal. Is he confident he’s going to be the World Cup number one?
GABY: Yeah I think he’s pretty confident. He’s posted it everywhere that he expects the big sell. So I think he is pretty confident.
PAUL: Yeah. And looking at the World Cup, are you excited?
GABY: Very excited, you know. We’ve waited a long time for it and especially in England we’ve waited longer than everyone else. Very excited.
PAUL: And predictions Gaby. How well are England going to do?
GABY: I do expect to be fair to about the semi-final hopefully. But hopefully they’ll go all the way, you know?
PAUL: England versus the USA on Saturday Gaby? Are we going to start with a win?
GABY: Yeah that’s a no-brainer isn’t it?
PAUL: (LAUGHS) looking forward to the new season?
GABY: Aaah. More than anything, you know, especially with the injury out of the way. So I’m definitely looking forward to it, and hopefully get off to a good start, and just kick on.
PAUL: Well listen Gaby, thank you for coming on this morning on the Big Show. Enjoy the World Cup, and we’ll speak to you when the season’s under way.
PAUL: He’s Gaby Zakuani, Peterborough United. (CLAPS) Let’s just get a prediction from Michael Shuster our resident American. England versus USA on Saturday Michael? What do you think?
MICHAEL: Well it’s a no-brainer isn’t it?
PAUL: Yes it is.
PAUL: (LAUGHS) I’ll leave it at that.